12:30 sharp start , upstairs bar at the The Old Doctor Butler's Head, EC2V 5BT
12:30 - 12:31 Welcome and hello
12:31 - 13:30 Remote Presentation : Rob Volk
Revenge: The SQL!
Have you been wronged, cheated, lied to, lied about, or deceived by a coworker? Feel like your DBA position offers no opportunity for revenge? WRONG! This session is a light-hearted exploration of some delightfully mischievous SQL design patterns that will annoy, aggravate, and antagonize anyone who has to work with them...even though they deserved it! Learn how to create tables with no names, columns with duplicate names, and write perfectly valid yet utterly nonsensical SQL. You may never get to use these techniques…but you'll ache for the chance!
Speaker photo Rob Volk does deranged things with SQL Server, so you don't have to. A DBA in the Metro Atlanta area since 2001, he has also abused other database and programming platforms elsewhere and elsewhen. In his spare time he accomplishes more than he does on the job, just don't tell his boss.